The Aquarius Man (Re-post)

The Aquarius Man (Re-post)

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This month, we have had Mars in Aquarius and now have Venus and Mercury in Aquarius, with an approaching New Moon in Aquarius. Mercury retrograde in Aquarius will prolong Mercury’s visit in this sign so that it lasts six weeks until March. Valentine’s Day falls in this period, on February 14, 2015. There is promise of hot air and empty romantic talk as well as new beginnings that could finally bring completion and fulfillment to some relationships, So, here is a reposting of one of my most popular articles, which casts some clarity on the inner workings and outward behaviors of Aquarius men. Remember, you CAN find love no matter what your sign. Arrange an astrology  consultation with me on your love life and I will help you see the open door and the key to making things work. Please feel free to post any questions or thoughts you have. 
 

The Social Butterfly

The Aquarius male is a seemingly unconventional and innovative flirt who can charm those around him. Liking to surprise others, he is unhappy if he feels his freedom is being diminished. He believes his way of doing anything is the most superior way. His ego is not out in the open like a Leo, but it is as big as that of a Leo. He can be very argumentative, liking to debate things or fabricate WILD untrue stories just to irritate others and to show off what he believes to be his superior intellect. The best strategy, most times, is to laughingly feign belief in and shock at his wild story and go along with it, asking questions etc. The Aquarius male enjoys social interaction and like to be known for impressing groups of people for a good cause, thus a partner who also has these capabilities, is desired.

Appearing to be an open-minded person, he can be willing to explore unlimited horizons within limit, so long as it fits his idea of fairness or does not make him stand out in a negative way in his community.

**DANGER** But remember this: in any relationship with an unevolved and immature Aquarius male, he can coolly and quickly sacrifice your name and reputation or let you suffer in some way if he thinks standing by your side will make the public at large dislike him. Yes, he can throw you to the wolves. A lack of compassion and empathy for other people comes naturally to the Aquarius male and he may believe it to be be “logical” to treat you this way to preserve or protect himself.

The Aquarius male is very obstinate and will hold to a position or opinion unless he 1) is confronted with the fact that it is unfair or inhumane or 2) realizes he is being unfair or inhumane. Sometimes he merely likes to see if he can “wind up” someone by resisting whatever they ask.

He has trouble coping with individual relationships because they require him to be authentic on a deep level. He is a great social butterfly and loves a party where he can eat, drink and be merry on a superficial level. If lacking in maturity, he may be so unconscious of his behavior that he gets himself mentally wound up in fear of being alone with you and show up an hour or more late to meet you, and then only to cancel. Let him…and then do not make another appointment with him nor allow him to make one unless he states upfront that he will make the time for it.

The Charming Liar

Due to innate insecurities and fears of not being competent, loved and accepted, they maintain a wall of defense, not allowing even someone they like or love to get too close. In close relationships, conflicts naturally occur – but this closeness does not get to occur with the Aquarius male. He would rather make a joke of things and begin talking about another topic to escape dealing with any topic which may cause emotions to be expressed. He will label emotional expression as “illogical”, “unnecessary” and “irrational”. He commonly will label YOU as “illogical”, “irrational” or “unreasonable” for expressing emotions. He is then likely to walk out of the room and refuse to discuss the topic at hand.

When he is angry, the Aquarius male will not yell or otherwise obviously show it. Instead, he will become very MEAN and say mean/cruel things that he knows or thinks will hurt you, with a glib smile. Then he will airily say he needs to go, and leave the room or hang up the telephone. He is also quite capable of doing something very mean to you out of anger.Aquarius males like to talk about honesty and truth but it venusaquariusis always their truth and their version of honesty that is important. They can be quick to label you as dishonest or say that you do not know or speak the truth. This is also because they are by nature distrustful. This also means you must be wary of the Aquarius penchant for lying—lying done with a glib smile and intellectual air.

The Spotlight Seeker

It is when you are an outstanding (prominent or unusual) individual that he will notice you. He will want to hitch his wagon to your star. The Aquarius male likes to collect “friends” who he may call friends but even after many years are only acquaintances, even if he accompanies them on short trips or camping, picnics with them, lets them stay in his home or has dinner with them once a month or so. He is merely being sociable. He prefers being alone in his home with his quirks that he thinks others will not accept from him. If he likes you, you are one of the MANY people he has generally befriended and that is not necessarily a bad thing as he can make such people feel they are receiving special attention from him.

Physical Appearance

This man typically is not classically attractive but can be, as in actor Paul Newman. But, if he has strong Aquarius energy or an Aquarius Ascendant, he can have bucked, crooked and broken teeth, a large nose with a bump in it, droopy eyelids/sleepy eyes, and a long neck and a long face like Ichabod Crane and this quirky physical appearance will somehow be somewhat attractive. It will be especially attractive, of course, to a woman who has a tendency to fall for unusual looking men. As with all Aquarius’ they need to watch out for injuries to the calves and ankles.


 Aquarius Men and Relationships (Does He Like/Love You?)

The Aquarius male knows clearly who he is NOT attracted to and would never consider as a marriage partner. If the Aquarius male DOES NOT like you romantically and you persist in trying to get into his life, do not be surprised if his rejection is so cold and clear you can feel the icicles forming on your face.

This is what happened to one Leo woman who spent five years trying to manipulate heaven, earth, and many people, all in an attempt to coerce an Aquarius male into marriage. She based their relationship on gossiping, maligning, criticizing and doing devious acts of harassment to a woman the Aquarius male would not discuss. After nearly five years of this behavior, Ms. Leo made yet another annual trip to the city where Mr. Aquarius lived, in hopes of marriage. She was turning 30 and feeling desperate about marriage and hoped he would start dating her and marry her. She got the shock and humiliation of her life because Mr. Aquarius decided enough was enough. He knew all along Ms. Leo was not the kind of woman he wanted to be connected to as a partner, nor did he want to introduce her to his family. He coldly and clearly told her that he would never date her and never marry her. The biggest shocker was that Mr. Aquarius let Ms. Leo know that the woman she had been maligning and harassing all those years was the woman who had had his mind and heart the entire time!

aquariusstrategyHere is the key Aquarius male trait, especially where it concerns women: he behaves in the exact opposite way that he is feeling inside. You see it is an Aquarius male strategy, like Spock playing a game of chess aboard the U.S.S. Enterprise. It is when the Aquarius male likes you way too much (as in, falling in love with you) that he has noticed you clearly and separated you from the crowd in his mind and heart. He does not want to give clues and acts even more detached. This means he has found you to be intellectually, emotionally (!!) and physically someone he desires. He knows he wants to marry you but he questions the illogical way you make him feel.

Does this mean the Aquarius male will romance you? Not naturally!! In fact, because he has fallen in love with you he will likely cancel or forget or show up ridiculously late for appointments you have made for 1-1 activities (such as dinner). He will prefer public and group gatherings and at those he is prone to ignore you, not talk to you yet talk to everyone else, flirt with other women, and he is likely to tell his male buddies reasons why he does not trust you, and why he seemingly avoids you. But when no one else is looking, he is watching YOU at the party or other social event. He is collecting information on what significant people think of you. If you are a woman who is extroverted, gregarious, smiling, popular, intelligent and attractive (especially if you are of a different ethnicity, nationality, unusual in dress or appearance etc) he is following you around the room and at other times he has his ears open for any news about you. He is filing it all away in his mind because he wants to be able to “surprise” you with all the information he has gathered about you.

**WARNING** Be prepared to move on from the Aquarius man because often they lose the woman they love because they use their fixed energy to sustain an aloof manner and do not get engaged and married, thinking there is always more time to figure out a way to avoid emotional intimacy. If you have an Aquarius man like this in your life. move on to a man who is available and commits to you.

However, this is not a two-way street with the Aquarius male. He likes to “know” you but does not want you to know him or anything about him. If you let him know that you know anything about him he will make jokes, laugh, deny, and change the subject, especially desiring to turn it back to a discussion about you and what he thinks he “knows” about you.

In intimate relationships, they are not very intimate. Aquarius males are great with the future and progressive thinking, but not so good the past. This is because 99% of Aquarius males have a paternal (father) situation where their father was absent from home a lot, abusive, alcoholic or a drug addict, commonly known for having sexual affairs and a cold, empty marriage with the mother, and as a result the Aquarius male never received guidance and instruction on being a warm and loving man in general and especially not with a woman. They feel “different”, sometimes to the point of weirdness and other times to the point of egoism (superiority). At the base of it is deep insecurity and fear at not being competent, loved and not being accepted. He grows up feeling inside that he cannot express himself in an intimate loving relationship with another individual…so he opts for focusing on the masses.

Because of his fear of intimacy in a 1-1 relationship with a woman, the Aquarius male is very likely to want to move his girlfriend or family to a foreign country where he has social and professional advantage and can spend more time in the company of others than with her; OR he may look for or create a job in another country so that he is not home very often. It would also not be unlikely for him to justify having sexual affairs while he is working overseas. It is not uncommon to find a marriage involving an Aquarius husband where the wife only sees him a few days a month to attend a cocktail party or a Sunday family dinner (to keep up appearances!).


Sex and the Aquarius Man

It is not usual to find an Aquarius man in his 30s who, despite all his “man about town” charm is a sexual virgin, and well, emotionally too! Often they are a “mama’s boys”, still married to his mother in his 30s and 40s, content to avoid relationships with women because he gets sustenance from his mother. He resists getting intimate because he has reached adulthood and doesn’t know what to do sexually. His big ego doesn’t want to risk being criticized or laughed at during an attempt at sexual intimacy, so he would rather put it off as long as possible. He also seeks to avoid having to be emotionally intimate, which is a part of satisfying lovemaking so it will be challenging for the two of you.

Undergirding that, he isn’t necessarily out to do a “wham bam thank you ma’am” and hurt you. He simply, at 34, is more like a 14 year-old boy who would rather coldly suppress his sexual desire for a woman have a sex life consisting solely of masturbation, rather than risk what he fears could be could be humiliation. Thus, when he does finally overcome fear and connect with a woman emotionally and sexually, it is a serious commitment to him.

The Sexual Intellectual and Experimenter

The Aquarius male tends to approach sex intellectually. His curiosity can become a relationship-destroying fascination with or addiction to pornography.

He is awkward and uncomfortable about expressing his love through physical gestures. Actual physical sex may not occur for a very long time in a relationship with an Aquarius male. He likes to talk about fantasies and desires and share thoughts with a lover. He is inherently curious and so when sex finally occurs, he likes to experiment creatively between the sheets. They appreciate a confident sex partner.


Dating, Marriage and Divorce

When an Aquarius man ignores you, ignore him in return. He will get the message that if he wants to connect with you he must be mature and fair by acknowledging and talking with you. At that point, if you want to deal with this man any more, explain to him privately that he needs to relate to you in a human and warm manner and lower his guard.

He is in his head often and spends a lot of time alone. When there is a conflict or potential for one he can run away, or at least say he needs to go for a (long…hours long) walk or ride alone. Let him know this is not acceptable and that he must deal the relationship more than run away. Some solitude is fine but not every time there is something to be discussed (usually his behavior).

The Aquarius man can be particularly emotionally cold, verbally mean and quite selfish. They will quickly and cheerfully do something for others, as long as it has no impact on their life. If still very stuck in their ego and immature, they will strongly resist doing anything to help another person if it will mean a sacrifice of time, money or emotional commitment. This emotional abandonment can leave any woman he is in a relationship with feeling rather uncared for and she is likely to leave the Aquarius – which typically baffles the unevolved Aquarius male.

When he has become mature and evolved, the Aquarius man can move beyond these childish habits and be a superior intimate who is very committed (Aquarius is fixed energy). He will still ignore a woman he likes, at first, because he is shocked that he could care for one woman above all others. But once he lets his guard down, he will be an extremely considerate lover and best friend.

The Aquarius Male as Family Man

As a family man, Aquarius men tend, much like Leo males, to put great pride in the family and want it to appear healthy and happy to the world. This can be read as a tendency to want a traditional family life. They want sparkling, intelligent, industrious and socially graceful wives; healthy, happy, smart, productive children,  and a home life that is secure and warm. You know a group of lions is call a “pride”, right? They tend to marry women with leonine characteristic, warm-hearted and generous, equally as proud of spouse, children and very protective of home, hearth and the family image. As fathers, most Aquarius males are patient with their children and encourage them to play and fantasize. They are particularly excellent at helping their children with mathematics and science homework.

The Aquarius man will be very reluctant to say so but in large part he married you so that he could have you around him all the time, loving and caring for him. He loves you, too, and if he is  a smart man he will ask you how to show it to you and then follow through, so that you do not leave him due to coldness. Tell him he must start saying “I love you (Your Name Here)” aloud, even in public.

An Aquarius man seldom forgets his first love, the female who makes him feel special. Unless he has learned to embrace his warm (polar sign) Leo energy, he may not be so romantic, but every now and then, he comes up with such beautiful lines that you feel as if you are soaring in the sky. He will do the things that you tell him make you happy because he wants to see his wife smile and be joyful. Having a proud, happy and warm lioness around makes him a proud and happy man and gives him a place to express the emotions he needs to detach from in the outside world. His life becomes BALANCED.

He may fuss about celebrating his birthday, but he will get you red roses and jewelry on Valentine’s Day, find out your favorite flower and have a dozen delivered on your birthday and he will embrace your family. He will be ready for all the family holiday occasions with their meals, noise and general craziness.  In the quiet of your alone time, or holding you close at a party and whispering in your ear, he will say something so meaningful to you that you can excuse his earlier neglect (remember his charm?).

The Women Aquarius Men Desire

The women that Aquarius men desire are complex, mysterious, unusual, intelligent, and usually very caring and emotionally warm (in opposition to him!!) even if cool on the outside. She must be a woman who is a fighter and can hold her ground. He may outwardly claim that he likes women who are unobtrusive, blend in with the crowd and everyone likes them, but in reality he likes the outstanding, feisty, dramatic woman whose inner life is a mystery, whose motives and moves are complex and mysterious and who cannot be controlled and tamed. This is also the woman with whom he will compete because he likes challenges with her, even though he innately feels he is dominant to her and/or superior in some way He wants to be the man who is partnered with the woman everyone else wants to get close to and call friend/lover/wife.Speaking of a wife, the Aquarius male is, especially in the late 20th/early 21st centuries, the man you will find shucking and jiving, ducking and covering, hiding and running from marriage.

The sentence ‘I love you’ will take a few years of knowing each other to come from his mouth and but do not believe it unless he backs it up with a ring and a wedding date. If he is unevolved and immature he will lie or make up any excuse he can think of, to avoid those three words for as long as he can. The Aquarius male, more so than many others, can justify in his head having one or more extramarital sexual affairs, claiming it was not his intention or “it just happened” etc. The sexually and emotionally dishonest cheating of the unevolved and immature Aquarius male (selfish, mean, dishonest) can even be the cause of a divorce, but he will quietly refuse to be the person who files for the divorce, because he wants his partner to be the one to “look bad” in the eyes of family, mutual friends, and acquaintances by filing for divorce against the “good guy Aquarius”.

Commonly, even prior to the 20th/21st centuries, the Aquarius male frequently divorced many times, unable to commit to marriage due to his quirks and habits. In present times, the Aquarius male may is likely to be more conscious about his fear of commitment to another person and his fear that he will be forced to spend long amounts of time with one person. He will reach his late 20s sexually inexperienced and emotionally naive about relationships with women. Courting is a puzzle to him and he moves slowly. He usually looks for a female who is his best friend. He will coolly hide his feelings of jealousy, which he WILL feel because he tends to choose as his mate woman who has her own popularity and entourage, so to speak.

If you are a woman who gives an Aquarius male your time and energy, one day, he will realize that his friends are moving in together, marrying and having babies. Feeling left out of the crowd or that he must “get a clue” and solve the mystery of marriage (or more specifically) to solve the mystery of you and relating to you. He suddenly wakes up in his 30s and realizes there is one woman who knows him and yet still loves him; he recognizes he could lose the best thing that has ever have happened to him. He is amazed and still cannot understand everything about you, but he is intrigued and magnetically drawn to you. Of course he realizes there is no guarantee that you can be uncovered and solved, but he is stubborn enough to spend several decades married to you and delving into the mystery.

Divorce

Sign a pre-nuptial agreement before marrying this man because in a divorce, he will be a cold and heartless monster who ensure that he takes whatever benefits him and being fair to you is not likely to be his concern. No matter what he says before marriage. Do not fool yourself. The pre-nup will be what makes it a fair divorce, not his charming pre-marital promises. You will be dealing privately with Jack the Ripper in a divorce yet publicly everyone will only see him as a charming Rhett Butler.


The Aquarius Male and Finances

As his female partner, you will never worry about money. The Aquarius male will always secure money, through work or investments. Co-ruled by Saturn (its classic ruler before Uranus was discovered), Aquarius may like to buy quirky items, BUT will be conservative about spending. When it comes to having too plan for life with a spouse or family, the Aquarius man will be one of the better men with finances. The best thing is to work out a partnership plan to determine how financial resources are to be shared and keep open channels of communication about money.

Do not be extravagant with money or he will feel deeply hurt that you squandered what he was trying to save for the two of you. He may make bad mistakes with finances as a young man but he will eventually correct himself. Having good finances is important to him and bad finances are a source of shame for him that he can tend to want to hide. Money affect what one can do in life and he wants to be financially free to live expansively. Sometimes he can be a tightwad and will need to be reminded to loosen the purse strings and live a little more humanely. He can be very stingy on the extras if he feels there is not a lot of money in the family, but you will never lack for basics of having shelter, food, insurance, medical care and transportation.

He will support you if you work in an unusual profession or do not make a regular salary, as part of his Aquarius quirkiness. If your income is lower than his, he will pay the mortgage, food, insurances and utilities (things he would normally pay alone anyway) but expect to be able to trust you to you to handle the finances well and provide the non.financial care and nurturing that makes life abundant. He will have outbursts of generosity every now and then.

2 thoughts on “The Aquarius Man (Re-post)

  1. This information is very informative but as far as finances are considered most are terrible at budgeting their money. I find most of the men including my brother to be lazy. They want everything handed to them but they refuse to help themselves. They are great charmers & can get anyone to do anything for them. As an fellow air sign I use to find Aquauris men to be the best match for me, but as I get older, these men aren’t the best match for a Gemini romantically, probably only friendship. After having a 9 year on & off relationships with an Aquauris man he really opened my eyes to never date this sign again under no circumstances! He was the most selfish & self centered person l ever met. Everything had to be on his terms & time, nothing matter about me, it was ALWAYS ABOUT HIM! He couldn’t stick to anything he starts. He was pathetic! I thought that by me being very non-selfish, generous, loving, protective, loyal, honest and consistent he would open up more & see there’s someone who truly loves him for him but in the end he never appreciated me so l left without looking back…

  2. Hi, Im a Pisces and my Aqua man (Ex) is the most complex male creature I’ve ever encountered in my Life, the man that has turned completely upside down my world, the one that has me mourning as we speak. It’s been only a week, but it feels like ages since the moment I found out about his betrayal to our Love relationship of 8 years. A relationship we both were committed at our own free will or so he made me believe he was in it with me 100%. Our relationship was not the typical, I think is one in thousands that someone could endure what I thought we both had to, because I am convinced he thought he could get away with murder and I could never find out. But, Life is a box a chocolates indeed, full of surprises, some pleasant and some that can actually kill your spirit, have your soul in complete despair in seconds. Literally feel the physical pain in your body too, not able to breath easily. If you ever truly loved with all your mind, body and soul then you can understand me. I also think it is only a one time Life Experience, because we can love again, but never again with the same intensity as we’ve have this UNIQUE ONE TIME and we must admit it because deep down in our hearts we know is true. I’m sharing this with you to see if anyone out there could probable tell me WHY he behaved the way he did. Our relationship of 8 years has been tested tremendously not because of both of us but because Life itself brought all these situations to keep us apart, challenges we worked through the years to stay together, we both wanting to be and share our future with plans to grow old together in a quiet and simple life. Don’t want to bore you with all the details, I will tell you about the most relevant so you can have an idea. Here it goes. Our history started in US, we met and it was an immediate mutual attraction, first 7 months were intense loving each other in every aspect, then next 3 months he was showing his AQUA NATURE and he got me confused because I couldn’t understand his ways, like many here have explained situations I can relate to because I’ve lived them with him too. Then, My Mind was still able to allow me to protect myself, take care of my feelings and sanity to make harsh decisions and I did after Valentine’s day when we were going into our 2nd year together. That night after we made love, I talked to him about our relationship and where it could have been heading to if he had not been behaving the way he had been in the past 3 months, attitude that I was not willing to put up with or accept it because I was not used to these type of games, so I ended the relationship. I wanted to see a reaction, he was looking right at me listening attentively to everything I said but He couldn’t speak to me! He was not able to say anything, at that moment we have never had a yes or no in our relationship, I guess he was not expecting I could let him go. I wanted to end in good terms wishing him the best and for him to find his happiness the same way I will try, this is February. I missed him deeply but never called him after that night, not even once. Well, as UNPREDICTABLE as an Aqua Man could be, one night in December (10 months after) he showed up at my door, he knew I was home but, he didn’t knock. He left a note asking me to call him, be in touch with him again. I couldn’t resist him, AQUA MEN can be CHARMING to the point that you can’t say NO. I called him back and everything started all over again, this 2nd time around our passion and craziness for each other stronger than ever exploring and sharing each other in every way, passion that has lasted all these years even when we have been separated physically for what could have been 5 years this August. Yes, when we came back we stayed for 1 year enjoying each other but then again because of LIFE this time we got physically separated again, you may be thinking WHAT? … I told you we have not been the typical couple. 5 years ago he had to leave US, he couldn’t get a Visa to come back again. Well, you may think … no problem… easy solution, if he can’t come, I can go and visit him, NOT! He asked me to wait for him because he was in the transition of moving from this country to another, to give him time to resolve this issue. Make story short, we have been in contact as a long distance relationship still much in “Love” making plans for our life together finally happening this year. We didn’t have an OPEN RELATIONSHIP even when we have spoken about, because my heart couldn’t understand it but my Mind could understand he as a MAN has biological needs for sex, I was open to accept it, that’s how much I love this man seeing his needs before mine. In the meantime, I wouldn’t think to satisfy my desire with anyone else. However, he strongly disagree to any kind of arrangement like this because he couldn’t accept me being touched by anyone else but him, the woman he eventually would like her to be living with him as his partner, friend, lover, etc… etc.. that he could manage on his own, not to even doubt him for a moment that he could be with anyone else either. I was convinced he could have sex but I didn’t care if he wouldn’t acknowledge it to me neither I would dig into it because our relationship was far way more important to keep. I’m an independent career woman, established business wise, confident, not jealous, free spirit, very understanding about men’s views because during my career I had to think like a man making business decisions, so I had to study strategies in how a Man could think about an specific issue at hand and in how with me being a woman I could resolve it. I consider myself an average beauty but Men showed me differently, honestly every day I get a compliment even walking or while driving Men are trying to meet me to the point that it is annoying. My Aqua man with his ego has introduced me proudly to his friends and his Mom as the woman that he is in Love! The woman he will live with, make a Life together! I even talked to them, but MEN they protect each other… they protected him because they knew, only one friend once gave me a clue about what was happening and I thought he was teasing me, later I told my EX about it and what he did was to make sure I could never talk to this friend again. My EX was very protective of us, he wouldn’t allow anyone to interfere in any way. Well, a week ago I got this text coming out of the blue from where he lives, I didn’t know this phone # but I thought it could be an emergency or something because it was more than 2 weeks I haven’t heard from him after an incident that happened to me where I almost died and he suddenly seemed couldn’t handle it and he shelled which is the behavior they will exhibit when it comes to things they can’t handle, so I was worry calling him in case he could be in trouble needing my help… NO!!!! it was from a woman that when I responded her text right away called me to find out WHO I AM in his LIFE! of course we talked like civilized people because she wanted to find out about me and our relationship as much as I wanted to find out about hers with him. He has been living with this woman for 2 years now! While he continued making plans with me! You have to understand my shock, this man says he loves me, makes plans with me, he doesn’t want to quit our relationship not even when we talked about it because of all the obstacles we had to survive to keep our relationship, this woman even told me she knows he will leave her because he already told her he will go away at the end of this year, around the time when we were planning to be together! I know she reached out to me because she is fighting to keep him but I felt his betrayal and told her not to worry about me. She even offered to call me that night and put him at the phone for me to speak with him but she didn’t. She didn’t want to confront him for him to make a choice…???? What that ..F…ck! You see , I couldn’t leave it alone, I could probably ignored this conversation, pretend that never happened and wait for his phone call since him being a typical AQUA MAN we know sometimes they will not call you for 3 weeks and then call you again like nothing had happened explaining that maybe they were meditating, busy with work, blah blah….. and in his mind our relationship is OK and he still loves me as much…. But you see, I couldn’t because I’m being honest and truthful with him all the time and he knows me so well that I wouldn’t be able to hide from him anything and worse something like this! I was in so much pain that couldn’t think straight and Next thing I DID I sent him texts messages, called him and left voice mails with all these insults….First time ever I have done this…be out of control like a maniac…. We haven’t even had a FIGHT before…Gosh! I sent and said all these messages because I wanted to HURT HIM as much as he has … so he knows now I KNOW…. And copied on text messages to the other woman….I know childish! But my heart is in pieces!!! And he has not responded my calls or texts…. I’m writing to you right now and this is the day that he has not called me…. I don’t know if she has confronted him or if he has …. Obviously, he didn’t want me EVER to find out about this…. Plus this woman had to spy on him to obtain my contact info and talk to me… so she could be a WITCH in disguise, what I do know is …. my dreams with him are destroyed, he even told my Mom about our plans. It is horrible! My question is: WHY he did this if he had the freedom to go anytime, he just needed to speak with me, WHY would he stay with me (remember we have not been in bed in years) if he has been having SEX with this other woman? Apparently not a serious relationship if he has talked to her about leaving her…. ???? meanwhile making plans with me to finally be together….???? I’m completely clueless…. The only thing I care about right now is to know whether his HEART is with me or with her….. so, what do you think? Could someone please! Help me understand this behavior of his…. WHY kept me hanging into THIS?…… Believe me when I say the last thing I care about is him having SEX only with anyone else….. because distance can make it hard for a man to be satisfied…… but what really gets to me is having SEX with someone for 2 years …… does this mean he loves both????? …. I want to go there and speak to him directly see his face….and no wait any longer for his call to explain this to me….. but then…. Right now, I’m Furious and don’t have the strength to face him because first I need to COMPREHEND HIS behavior ….. PLEASE SOME ONE HELP ME TO FIGURE THIS OUT!!!!!! Gigi

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